To Reverand Will Morrey, Trustee to NCH

Reverand Will Morrey

South Wales District Chair
12 Llwyn-y-grant rd
Cardiff
CF23 9ET

Sep 28 2007

Dear Reverand Morrey,

A meeting took place between myself, Barbara Peacock, Nigel Harper, Andrew Mchardy and another member of Memory Gardens, Becky Perriman on Sept.6 at 2.30pm. It was put back from an August meeting because people went on holiday.

It was not a comfortable meeting. In fact I felt bullied and cornered.

There were many cross-references, abrupt endings, interuptions and word manoevering which quite frankly left Becky and I not knowing the full content of the words that played out.

There were accusations of misconduct made towards me.

The land has been left unprotected since the Legard Family Centre closed and I am juggling running courses and managing local youths who now regulary break in. I am also trying to ensure access through a system- which has now broken down- whereby I collect keys from London Regional office in order to gain entry to the garden.

These keys were no longer there one day when I went to pick them up at the office. No explanation was given. Another set for weekend access did not work. Everyone was on holiday. I needed to get in because I have obligations to my members and this access was promised. So I made a decision to use a spare key that I had cut as a precaution because I know that these situations arise. I am glad I did this because otherwise I would not have fulfilled my responsibilty towards the project during what now turns out to be our last summer at the garden. Did I act moraly or not? Of course NCH representatives think not, but it it not as clear-cut as that.

The decision I made to keep the garden open by making a spare key is now incriminating me and this is being used as a way of putting pressure on us to come to an early agreement on closure or otherwise to face the humiliation of being escorted down by a security gaurd whenever we wish to use the site. No community could flourish or even endure under such scrutiny. I do not know why NCH could not have trusted me as the co-ordinator of the project with a key in the first place, which would have avoided all this insult and counter insult. The keys have now been replaced but responsibility for what went wrong is not evenly shared by NCH.
The basis of the arangement is now mistrust. All my suggestions to work together are now conditional on NCH securing a date of our departure. The idea that I put forward to Clare Tickel to annex the land with Peter Bedford Mental Health project whose members attend our courses has been disregarded.

It is as I had thought in the worst case scenario. It is a “Them” and “Us” mentality with NCH trying to isolate and shame us into disapearing as quickly as possible- as if we were never really there.

I took Becky along because she knows our project inside out. She has participated creatively in the adult courses and now works with the autistic young people on a Sunday. She is an excellent qualified play-worker flowing imaginatively in and out of their physical and mental rhythms; holding and extending their sense of presence. To see her shouted down by people who ought to know better or at least ought to have better manners, shocked me. I felt pain for bringing her.

Only after the meeting when as an after thought Barbara and Andrew agreed to visit the Garden, as in fact they had promised to do, was there any kind of equal footing. Then we could be the hosts and in that short walking tour we could all become more disposed to one another as the garden guided and paced us- as it has done for our members over the years.

But already this walk and brief affinity was only made possible in their eyes because the goal of termination was in sight.

Deep down we hold so many of the same core values but these can not be acknowledged because the representatives of NCH meeting with us feel that this would lose them time. Then to hear Nigel Harper say he regrets we were ever given permission to exist is surprising in its bluntness and it hurts.

Experience becomes good or bad by people`s shared outlook. It is not right that this outlook should be made by people who will not share in the experience or admit to sharing in it.

I deeply regret the way this ending is being played out by NCH. It is not representative of the day to day reality that is being lived out in the garden right now, which is one which is supportive in the best way it can be. We are not perfect, but we exist.

I need to tell you how I am feeling in this letter because rightly or wrongly I have come to associate you as a keeper of the whole picture. I hope this does not inconvenience you.

I am not expecting an intervention but I do want this to be on record as my version of the story as it is unfolding. Undoubtedly you will have other versions too.


Thanks,

Sincerely,


Ruth Solomon
Co-ordinator, Memory Gardens
Legard rd, N5 London